Wednesday, March 24, 2010

when cogito fails (x-post)

what am I this I
which I
this me that I see that is seen
that is the me you see as you
as I see you
which I
who am I
what am I
why am I
where am I
who is this me an abstract inexact abstraction
from the self that is perceived as me
or as you
if it’s you whose perception is required
for existence of this persistent form
that is the I that I believe to be me
if me is real as I
as you
but real is relative
how relative to relate to the self
to my self
to your self
your reality different to mine
you see me as you
I see you as you and me as me
but this me this self
is ill formed sense of being
belonging to what or where is anybody’s guess
but not mine
I choose not to choose
not to guess or require
suggestion of reality
being that which I would be
or you believe me to be
is enough for some
but for me I don’t know
this me I don’t really know
but exist within this frame of perception
this me that is I
that is the you that you see
is this really the me that I see
are we one
this you in your eyes
this me in my mind
who are we
this I me you conglomeration of perceived beings
forming the self
this self
my self
which defies definition or serious inquisition
as to purpose
without purpose I am adrift
in this sea of self
selflessly see that around me as unreality
questioning all that is perceived
this self then questions it’s perception of self
am I
is me
does my self equate with being
if perception is to exist
and perception is questioned
where I this self
my self
this I that is the I that I see
that is me
the you that you perceive
or do you
do I
is this self perceived
or self deceived
by that which we trust in
to deliver us from void into being
into meaning
in existence we trust
but by perception do we measure
the immeasurable
with fallible translation
of sensation
by the mind
the infallible most foolable tool
able to do so much with so little
must all of it be real
or just that reality which agrees with self perception
of meaning
of being
of that I which is me
that is dissipating
the destruction of the self
this entropic being
going the way of all things thermodynamic
breaking down
returning to null state
apathetically allowed not encouraged
as much as this me appears to do
with excess and stress
I digress from me
follow paths outside the borders of my self
this self
whose existence I begin to question
to doubt
without doubt I do not exist
if unable to question that which is around
do I exist at all or drift
in void and null
but if I exist to question
can I exist without question
of my own existence
but losing track of that
certainty fallacy of modern thought
can I still exist at all
but what is existence
but awareness of self
and what is awareness
if not the need to question
to doubt
but doubting that which is perceived
if I am but perception
am I in fact I
is this me
a me at all
am I at all
or am I not
and if I am not
are you
in that you perceive me
or do I perceive you perceiving me
who is deceived
if you are deceived
or if I am deceived
in that you are not of outside
but within me in my perception
this self deception of being
then reliance on your perception
to give me being
lacks substance
insubstantial this construct that is I
that is this I
that is me
is not to be
all that is believed

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